A Garden of Virtues

Little doll on a shelf Saying nothing Still and silent Is this how it's meant to be Where's your voice Where's your breath As you sit quietly Existing in a dim expanse Who closed these lips with coral paint Why are your cheeks so bisque-pale Who do you wait for, little doll To whisper in your shell ear Skirts so silken Shoes so polished Not a ruffle out of place Curls that frame a bisque-pale face Who looks into your blue eyes, little doll Who holds you close and dear Who allays your darkest fears While other people look on Exquisite love, forbidden thoughts Is this how it's meant to be For a girl to become a doll Is this what you're meant to be?

Thinking about getting a "summer doll" again has caused me to think much harder about my collection and what I really want. I can't ignore what feels "right" and what feels "wrong" and I think doll collectors go through this a lot. Basically I love collecting Barbies, because I can buy them all the time, slowly amassing my Superstar/vintages bit by bit, without much stress if I don't have the chance to play with them right away or if they aren't what I thought, or even if I ruin them trying to fix them (which definitely happens :P). On the other end, the costly end, I cannot deny that Asian ball-jointed dolls are my ideal. Right now, I have only one, and I would like to have more. I would even like Leslie to be a different doll. It would be a frightening thing to sell him not knowing if I would truly be able to afford the new doll at some point, but change is what gives the hobby excitement, even if there is uncertainty. At the same time,