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Thoughts on New Mexico Trip

Today, on the ride from Albuquerque to Tucumcari, I imagined what it would be like to be in my doll room again. I was overwhelmed with a delightful feeling.

The small sun room has become a fantasy place of delights, already abounding with more dolls than I can count.

Today I looked out over the New Mexico landscape of small twisted bushes and red hard-packed earth and thought of Leslie.

I knew I needed some time to be with my husband, to re-learn myself, and it has been an odyssey. I have been thinking of expanding the scope of A Garden of Virtues in a way that will continue to fulfill its purpose for me, and that may include other dear toys from the past, experimental decor and clothing to rouse a sense of nostalgia and preservation.

Already when I enter the sun room it seems like an unreal place, a place from a dream with objects from my past.

I collect and create without knowing exactly what I do, or why. If I knew perhaps I wouldn't do it. I am not reliving my past, but I am also not creating something original. I am expressing something that lies between re-dreaming and dreaming.

I thought how wonderful it would be to have my childhood playthings again, to make things for them and photograph them with the knowledge that I have now.

Today in the old bookstore in Tucumcari I saw a tumble of children's playthings in the area where I was browsing the used paperbacks. I recognized a Deluxe Doll from the 50's-60's, like the ones I have been studying and collecting. She was in such good shape. Perhaps I should have offered to buy her, but she was clearly someone's toy, wrapped in a leopard-print garment.

It gave this Route 66 town where we are staying more character.

Comments

yuis said…
What a wonderful trip you had! I love New Mexico. It truly is the Land of Enchantment. It sounds like you were certainly connected to that beautiful mysteriousness that is New Mexico when you thought of your former dolls and toys. The place between re-dreaming and dreaming...
Amanda said…
The beautiful mysteriousness describes it perfectly... That is just right. It is a land of enchantment, of mesas and clouds and endless sky, and I loved how I felt when I was there.
yuis said…
It is one of my favorite places. I am glad you were able to be there.

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