A Garden of Virtues

Welcome to my world, Fanchon, almost. I spent Easter weekend cleaning, sanding and sueding Fanchon and on Sunday strung her all up with new elastic. I was filled with pride for her. I would never have taken one of my other incredibly expensive dolls apart, nor would I have sudeded them, but Fanchon was not only very cheap, but had special needs and required all of this. I made things up as I went along. I used sewing elastic, which ends up being a little too slack, and I super-glued beige microfiber dust cloth to her sockets as her "suede." I have never even seen a doll sueded, but I really love how she turned out. You can see some of the buff-colored cloth around her joints, but it is positioned neatly, and I am proud to show that I did it. In addition I cleaned almost every little atom of paint from her, except from her face, which I knew better than to touch with anything damp, and her fingers, which were the worst hit and also the most delicate to clean. The residue is ve...

I wonder if I will ever do what I would like to do. I have three porcelain maidens, fairer than any doll I have seen, undressed, re-wigged and waiting for their fairy tale garb. One of them is Swanhilde, the Snow White. Another, Katharine, the Cinderella, and the third is Isabeau, the Beauty in the Beast's castle. I have had such fantasies about them and their clothes, but I have not had time to sew anything for them. In the house we might have there is a large building full of rusted junk. I relish the chance to make something of it. Finally I would be able to make my recycled doll house, and all kinds of things. For now the time I might give to dolls is all taken up, and any money I might spend on them profoundly out of the question. When I think of how fortunate I was to find and purchase Fanchon, my only ball-jointed doll, so cheaply, and before a time when I can do no spending at all. I don't know when I will be able to finish repairing her. Work has been so busy, and my e...

I took Fanchon apart today and examined her various maladies. It was strange to be handling a ball-jointed doll again. I really loved the feeling of scrubbing her down, examining her cracks and sharp edges and planning where I would suede her. I love the thought of transforming her from a horridly painted, cracked thing into a luxury ball-jointed doll. I put her eyelashes in today. It was my best setting ever! It was another thing I never thought I would do again. My work in the laboratory for the past year has made me much stronger and more dextrous, and I think I will be able to do everything I want for her. I will look on the forums about how to repair her cracks and chipping joints. I will plan everything I want to do before I put her back together again, because I do not want to unstring her again after this. She is too delicate.

Dreams I have had a couple of dreams recently. One was about Josette. I remember a dream of her at least once a week, but I have the feeling I dream of her much more often. I dreamed she was restored to me, that she had not burned. I saw smudges of black upon her skin I was able to wipe away. I sat her before me, her long, long hair draped around her. Her height, her heaviness, were exact to my memory. The next night I dreamed I received Betty the Beautiful Bride in the mail. That has a definite possibility of coming true, since Betty is on my list of wanted dolls.

Last week I had a vision of Fanchon and Elton walking together in River Legacy Park. I anticipated with happiness the forthcoming summer, when I will be able to photograph my dolls in nature again. I am going to resurrect my Flickr again, which I have not used in at least three years, as another medium for sharing. Spring is coming forth. Everything around me is a soft green. I can see down into the river from the balcony. The leaves are so tender and half-furled.

I can't believe it. It looks like the rusted gates to The Garden of Virtues are going to be laboriously parted by small articulated resin hands after all once more. I am glad that I am buying Lanie's Angel, but I am also a little sad. I remember disposing of Dresden along with my other dolls. I was in a vicious rage. I hesitated over Dresden's prone form, thinking, goodness, even I don't think of her as a BJD, is this really necessary? And then, blindly, cutting the strings. I can't believe I am actually talking about this now. I have not talked about it before. I regretted losing her afterward, because I did not really need to part with her. She was a sweet, special presence, a little woman. I have kept all of her eyes, wigs and clothes. Of course I will never forget the moments in which I divested all of my BJD's of their clothing, wigs and eyes. The other day Henry came around with a little velcro he had found and I grew faint, knowing that it had come fro...

I think Victorian's new name will be Barnabas. Victorian is too beta-male, Barnabas is more alpha-male. I will need Box cutter Avocado green paint Wider paint brush Things Barnabas should have A French coffee press A chef's apron Gourmet coffees Laptop and laptop bag A trendy messenger bag too, maybe in orange Clothing must-haves A frilly white shirt An olive tweed suit Indian-pattern pajamas from my chartreuse scraps from the skirt failure Also need to Check out dollhouse books from the library Cross stitch Exotic floor mats, wall hangings Plastic canvas Need to get furniture patterns Have good basket pattern Color palette Deep brown Avocado White Occasional stripe Rust tones, tribal colors